As everyone knows I call my youngest baby Noah "The Beast". Often at times I refer to him as being an a-hole simply because that is what he is. People tend to get completely bent out of shape over this. Yes, I understand why but until you have spent a day with him and seen him at his finest or lived in my shoes, don't judge me.
Noah aka The Beast aka A-hole is not an easy child. He is very difficult. Some people may be super mom or the perfect mom and deal with him and just smile and laugh but I cannot. I don't enjoy taking him places, don't enjoy being stuck at home with him and I really don't enjoy being high strung and on edge all of the time. Trust me, it's not fun and no way to live your life.
Yesterday is a prime example of how stressful it is to be with The Beast. My husband went out of town for work so it's just me and the three kids (ages 7, 4 and 17 months). I took them to the outlet mall to look for flip flops followed by a trip to Burger King so they could play at the playland. Well, the BK didn't have doors on the playland so I spent the entire time trying to keep the Beast in the playroom or chasing him around the restaurant. Why he must run all over the place when there is a huge room with things for him to climb I will never understand, but that is the Beast.
After his nap, I decided that since there was nothing on tv to take the three kids to Blockbuster and then out for ice cream. After exactly 7 minutes of intense screaming because he hates to be confined in his carseat, we got to Blockbuster and I told them to each pick out a movie. While I was browsing the aisles for a movie for myself, I was holding The Beast in my arms, on my hip. Well, he wanted down and wanted to get out my arms in the worst way. He started pushing away from me, wriggling his body and doing everything he could to get down. When I refused to put him down he starts hitting me and batting at me with his small little fists. He finally found that flab on the underside of the back of my arm, grabbed it and pinched really hard. You know that spot that just brings you to your knees and to tears because it hurts so badly? Well I dropped the little Beast on the floor just like he wanted. It took him exactly a half a second to get up and start running and grabbing movies and throwing them all over the place. As I lean down to pick the movies up and fix them, he runs to the candy aisle and starts doing it with that. By then, I am arguing with my eldest about her choice in getting a scary movie. I was near tears because I was so frustrated and so incredibly embarrassed. I told my daughter to just get the movie, grabbed the Beast and got out of there as fast as I could. He of course, screamed bloody murder the whole time I was trying to check out. I felt so bad for the check out girl, she was looking at me (I was just about to start sobbing) and trying to go as fast as she could to get me out of there.
That is just 15 minutes of my day, a day that is filled with situations like that. If I am not out and about, he is at home following me around whining and crying all day long. If I don't pick him up on command or sit and pay attention to him every second, he is hitting me or pinching me. His newest trick is he stands behind me while I'm cooking and purposely makes it so I trip on him and knock him over. Because then, of course I will pick him up.
So, when you add all of this on top of the other stuff and the fact that I haven't had a good night's sleep in almost 18 months now, you too would probably not be sitting there calling him your cute little snuggle bunny.
Lisa I would not want to be in your shoes. One thing I noticed is that "Dad" is out of town or often not around. It is so hard to raise children these days and the economy is so bad that sadly a lot of families have to sacrifice so much just to put food on the table. Please understand that I am not blaming your husband for not being there. He is the man of the house and he has to provide for his family. He is doing his part. I do feel sorry that you have to deal day after day with the issues of life as they are. I'll bet when you got married you didn't think it would be this hard. Look, I know that you love your children and I believe that you would die for them. I wish that I could have Nanny 911 come to help you. You should not have to figure out how to deal with headstrong children on your own. there are well proven methods for every child's personaity. I think that you are almost at your breaking point. Something's gotta give. I believe that you are doing the absolute best that you can and I commend you for it. You are so young and yet wise for your years. Any comments or "advice" I may give is only out of concern and a hope that in a small way I can help. I in no way ever want you to feel that I am judging you or criticizing you. If you felt that way I am so very sorry dear girl. Please forgive me. I have nothing but the utmost respect for you. Thanks for listening, Lisa S/
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