Olivia Nicole

On Saturday my baby girl will be turning seven.   Never in my life did I think that at the age of 33 I would have a seven year old, let alone a four year old and a one year old plus be a stay at home mom.    Anyway, this blog is about Olivia so back to her.  

I know that I am a little biased but I happen to think that I have such a gorgeous, amazing little girl.   She is so wise beyond her years which can be a good and bad thing.   Olivia is a fantastic big sister who is always taking her little brother into her arms to try and calm him down when he is upset.   She tries to teach Jackson everything that she is currently learning and is so caring towards animals.

Olivia was a little more like our Beast when she was a baby.   She gave me a lot of scares while I was pregnant with her.  I had just come off of a terrible loss, we lost our first baby girl in the second triamester and got pregnant with Olivia immediately after.   When I first got the call from the nurse at the clinic about the blood test I took, I heard the words "You are pregnant but......"   The nurse said that my progesterone levels were so low that we shouldn't get our hopes up that she would make it.    But, she did, the next time I was tested, the levels were going up just the way they were supposed to.   She knew that I couldn't handle another loss and needed her as much as she needed me.  That's Olivia, she is so considerate of everyone else's feelings.    We joke that she is going to be the first female president one day because she is so politically correct all of the time and will tell you what she thinks you want to hear so she won't hurt your feelings.

My little girl also came early - about 4 weeks.   My boss at the time told me that she needed a few days off, the 11th and 12th of May so I could have my baby anytime after that (lol) and sure enough, Olivia waited until May 13th to send me into labor.    It was the finale of Survivor and I wasn't about to miss it for anything.    I told the drs not to come in until after Survivor was over, my favorite player of all time, Rupert won the America's vote for one million dollars so after that happened, they came in, broke my water and Olivia Nicole LaJoye was born at 3:26am in Rochester Hills, Michigan weighing in at 7 pounds exactly.   She was born with a temp of 104 and had fluid in her lungs so immediately she was whisked away to the NICU.  It was so scary, my first baby and I didn't even get to see her right away or hold her since she was in an oxygen bubble for the first day. 

Olivia loved her pacifier, her bottle and her "ducky" blanket, a blanket that she still uses to this day to snuggle and console her when she is sad or upset.   She had an adorable little voice and was obsessed with The Wiggles.   She would call her grandma "Manga" and her dad "Treasure" (his name is Trevor) and didn't like it when anyone called her anything other than Olivia.   If you tried to tell her she was cute, she would look at you very seriously and say "No, my name is O-wee-a A-Joy".  She was a little troublemaker too, I remember that one day when my husband was out of town I was painting and Olivia was happily playing in the other room.   I turned my back for a second and when I looked she was sitting in the paint tray playing in the paint talking to herself.   Another time, I ran to the grocery store and when I came home, her daddy had fallen asleep on the couch so I went looking for her only to find her slathering our long haired cat Delilah with Desitin.  When she saw me, she looked up and said "Butt Medicine"....how do you not laugh?   Poor Cat.  

She is such a fun girl to be around that she always has a ton of friends where ever she goes.  With her, moving is not a problem beause I know she will be fine.   She loves to dance and is not shy.  Currently she is into coloring and art projects.   After a year of begging her to try and ride her bike without training wheels and her refusing, the other night she picked up her bike and taught herself how to ride it and in 15 minutes was cruising up and down the sloped driveway and down the street.   She is a mini female version of my husband.  So, my baby girl is turning 7 on Saturday and the years have just flown by - I feel like it was just yesterday that I was waiting for her to come.   Happy Birthday to my Olivia!!

We are Having a Safari!

So next Saturday my beautiful daughter Olivia turns 7.   When I asked her what she wanted her theme to be for her birthday it was a toss up between Justin Bieber (yuck) and a Safari.   Finally, she decided she wanted a Safari theme.   I know that in the past I said that I was going to "tone down" the birthday parties but how can you not go all out when you are having an African Safari Birthday Party??  

I am praying for good weather - warm and sunny because everything I have planned is for the outdoors.  I am screwed if it rains because I have nothing planned inside nor would I even know what to do.  Her party is from noon to three pm and here is what I have planned.

-We have an amazing yard with 5 acres.  On the land we have ATV trails going around the property.  So, my plan is to hide "Jungle" animals (aka the kids stuffed animals) in the trees along the trails and  then my husband will take 4 or 5 girls at a time on the Polaris Ranger thru the trails to go on a Safari to find them.  

-I bought these adorable rubber ducks dressed as safari animals from http://www.orientaltrading.com/ that I am going to hide around the yard and give the girls clues to hunt them down.

-We have a fire pit with a nice seating area so I thought that we would have a bonfire with S'mores with our pizza and cake.

-I bought zebra pinatas (2 of them) that we are going to hang up in the sunroom and let the girls go to town smacking around.

That combined with cake and opening up presents should be a fun time and a memorable birthday party for Olivia.    The RSVP's keep coming in slowly but surely so I think she'll have enough girls there to make it fun.

Thing's I've Learned Being A Mother

First of all, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all of you who are mothers or have been mothers or are about to become mother's.    I hope you had a fantastic day and got a little break.  

My day was pretty great.   My husband got up with The Beast at 6:45am and I put my earplugs in and slept until 10am, those three hours made a world of difference.   From my husband and The Beast I got the newest James Patterson book, from Jackson I got a hanging plant for outside and from Olivia I got a flower that I can plant outside along with many homemade things from school and Girl Scouts. 

In honor of Mother's Day, I have compiled a list of things that I have learned from being a Mother.   (I didn't come up with all of them on my own but they are all good and funny)

-There are bodily fluids that are more disgusting than poop.

-Despite all those promises you made while pregnant not to bore other people with endless talk and pictures of your children, you will

-Wine and Double Stuffed Oreos are an acceptable dinner 

-Sometimes you will lock yourself in your car just to enjoy the silence

-Alone in the car, with only your kids as an audience, you can really sing.

-You can put a child to bed, but you cannot make them sleep or stay sleeping.

-Kids can make huge mess out of the simplest meal such as a PB&J sandwich or a bowl of cereal.

-The color white should be avoided.  At all costs.

-The loss of a child is something that you will never get over, even if you are only 4 weeks pregnant.

-You will say completely crazy things to your children.  Those things that your mother said to you.  You will claim to have eyes in the back of your head and you will ask them if they live in a barn.  Mostly you will threaten to pull the car over right this very moment.

-Sleep deprivation will make you crazy,  but it won't kill you.

-(While breastfeeding a newborn) You will be nothing but a feed bag 24/7 and pumping will make you feel like a cow.

-You will do many things you said  you would never do

-Whatever annoying things you did to your parents....your kids will do to you. When you try to get sympathy,  your mother will laugh.

-Cleaning up after your children is like being trapped in the movie Groundhog's Day.  No matter what, it just keeps happening over and over.

-Being a mom makes your body messed up, your head ache, your mouth swear and your feet hurt.

-NEVER underestimate the healing power of a good cocktail (or two or three) at the end of the day.

Daisy

I have a cat.  Well, I actually have three cats but when we got rid of our house and started renting my family members took two of them.  I got stuck with Daisy.  Don't get me wrong, I adore her and she's adorable and so sweet but she has a problem.  Daisy has two bad kidneys and so she gets chronic Urinary Tract Infections.   I take her into the vet once a month to get a shot to keep them under control but she still has accidents on more than one occassion and it's getting old fast.   I have been doing the shots and medications for years thinking that she was never going to survive this long, how can she?  She has two bad kidneys.   Daisy is only 7 years old and looks like she is in the perfect health.   However, if you leave something on the floor like a shirt or towel, she pees on it.   She never pees on furniture or carpeting so it's always easy to clean up but it starting to become a major pain to me.    The kids are constantly leaving their clothes on the floor or a towel or their blankets, etc and the cat pees on them.    She also pees on plastic bags left on the floor. 

I feel so terrible for even thinking about putting her down but I have enough to deal with already having three kids and a house but to have to clean up after a cat too?   The kids adore her and she sleeps with either Jack or Olivia every single night.   The Beast loves to terrorize her and sometimes I swear he is trying to say "Daisy".    I just cannot justify putting a cat down who is not suffering but I am suffering.  My husband hates animals and didn't grow up with them so he of course has been saying "Kill her" for years now.   He has absolutely no compassion and that doesn't help.

I just don't know what to do anymore.  I don't have the strength to do it but I know in my heart I need to.   I have had her longer than I've had my kids in my life.   It is so hard.   I just feel like this might be the last thing that puts me over the edge.

I am a bad American because I refuse to celebrate that someone died.
I am a bad Mother because my kids stress me out.
I am worthless because I am a Stay At Home Mom.
I am obnoxious because I am Outspoken.
I am unintelligent because I make Spelling Mistakes and don't debate.
I am stupid because I watch Reality Tv.
I am lazy because I am not a size 3.
I am a bad wife because I am exhausted by 5pm and all I want to do is sit on the couch in my pajamas.

I'm sure the list could go on and on.   But do you know what?  I DON'T CARE.   These are all things that I'm sure many people think about me.   I know who I am and that's all that is important. 

Last night when it was announced that Bin Laden was dead I was more concerned with the fact that they interupted Celebrity Apprentice.   Sorry but that is true.  I didn't care to see the hour of reports before the President spoke.   I am not a fan of the president, I won't pretend to be and I don't have to be, that is my right.  I have my reasons and they are MY reasons, I do not have to justify them to anyone.   Just like there were many people who were not a fan of the last president, I did not  call them stupid or bash them personally for their opinion but last night  I was personally attacked for my opinion and for expressing it.    Even worse, I was personally attacked by a family member who claimed to "care".   I would never post something on someone's facebook wall attacking them for what they think or believe just because I did not agree with them, but that's me.  I just find it disrepectful. 

I do find it funny how all of the people today who are upset that last nights news became an "Obama bashing" because those are the SAME EXACT people who were busy bashing the last president when they didn't care for him.   Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.  

Anyway, I am stupid and unintelligent so I really don't know what my point to this blog is, I guess to just get something off my chest.    I will not apologize for who I am or what I think.   You think people would respect someone who has a brain of their own and is not afraid to express themselves.   As my brother in law stated who spent time in Afganistan, "I gave most of the hearing in my left ear so that you can have and express your own opinon even if it doesn't agree with mine. I urge you to continue to speak your mind. as I will never stop speaking mine".   So, my point is, if he doesn't seem to have a problem with it, why should anyone else? 

Early Intervention 1

So I'm sure you all saw my blog post yesterday about being "That Mom"  because I went ahead and called Early Intervention to come in and see The Beast.   His very first appointment was this morning.    Two people came out (the person who asks the questions and a student teacher) and of course he was a giant crab a$$ all morning.   The second they walked in the door, he was happy as can be.    It never fails, this child is trying his hardest to make me look like a liar.   I swear and you can ask my husband, when nobody else is around, this child is unhappy about 75-90% of the time. 

Anyway, they interacted with Noah and asked me a ton of questions about  things he is doing and not doing.   As I suspected, he has gaping holes in some of the areas of things that he should be doing.  The two most important ones are communication; he's not talking at all and not imitating.   After an hour, they decided that he most certainly qualifies to have both a speech therapist and occupational therapist come out and do an "official" evaluation of him.    We are having an occupational therapist come out because I have had a nagging feeling about something called "Sensory Processing Disorder".  Two friends have mentioned it to me in the past and I am more than willing to explore that option.   He probably doesn't have it and that is great but this will get that nagging feeling out of the back of my brain.   When I brought it up to his pediatrician he just shrugged it away like I was warned he would.   So, after these two people come out and officially evaluate him, we will know if he qualifies for Early Intervention or not.  

Just for the record, I do not think that the Beast is stupid.  In fact, I do believe he is much smarter than he lets on.   I also think it is entirely possible that this child is stubborn and strong willed and he knows exactly what he's doing by not talking or copying us yet.    But, just on that off chance that he does need a little bit of help or has some underlying issue, I will allow anyone who wants to come and view him and see what they think.   I am not too proud to say that I am at my wits end with this child and near a breakdown.  I'm tired.  I'm high strung.  I'm crabby.  I need some help.  

I am NOT that Mom

So today I was talking to a group of women about the situation a situation with Olivia and that got me on the topic of the Beast.   After much consideration, I decided to call Early Intervention last week and talk to them a little about the fact that he is not speaking.   Well, he speaks, we just aren't sure what language.   Anyway, I was telling them how after talking to Early Intervention, we mutually agreed to have them come out tomorrow for a meeting with Noah.   There was a woman at the table next to mine who instantly blurted out the fact that her child didn't speak until he was three.   So what?   That is great and all but what does that have to do with me and my child?   I tried to defend my decision like any mother would do and all she kept saying was "My child (insert name) didn't talk until he was three"....blah, blah, blah.   She then proceeded to tell me that I was "That Mother".   Really?   Just because I am calling in a professional to come and do a free evaluation on my child to make sure that he is developing properly, I am THAT mother?   What the heck is "That" mother anyway?  I am his mother, he was 7 weeks premature, the dr said that he should be saying at least three understandable words at his age and he isn't even saying one.   That makes me "THAT" mother?   Because I care about my child instead of just letting him go without talking when maybe he needs a little bit of help, that makes me overbearing and controling?   (Because you know that's what she means when she says "That" mother)   Maybe I am jumping the gun or over reacting just a little and I brought that up to EI on the phone because I was concerned that I would  be wasting their time.    The evaluator told me that there were a few things that I had said that had her feel that she should come out to see Noah.  

I just don't understand people, especially other mothers.   Why is it so hard to support each other without judgement?   I guess if caring about  my child makes me "THAT" mother, so be it.